Showing posts with label german weirdness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label german weirdness. Show all posts

Thursday, April 5, 2012

My Brain May Be Melting (Which Accounts for the Disorderliness of this Entry!)

     I confess to having been most anxious for this week to end. It's Osterferien (Easter break), which means that while the kids still go to the kindergarten (which runs with work schedules rather than school schedules), I don't have language class this week or next week. Most of my friends are out of town, Nate's in Greece at a conference, depriving me of two-three hours daily of Skyping, and I just have way too much free time and not enough to do with it. What's more, dark and early tomorrow (Friday) morning I take off for Vienna to visit the lovely Andrea Zomorodian for a couple of days, Easter Sunday and Monday in Salzburg with Leigh, then Nate comes Tuesday for a three-day visit. So basically, I need to tough it through till then. The worst part about fun things happening is how long it takes for them to come!

     Last weekend was good fun, however. Friday night was a fairly brief trip out to an Irish pub in town, which was probably a mistake, as it's packed even when it's not Friday night. We could barely move. The live music of the night was a band of three old guys and two hot (relatively speaking) young girls, one of whom was the lead singer, the other the keyboardist (if you can apply that term to someone who played with only her right hand the entire time). Their repertoire consisted entirely of very typical American songs, which of course the Germans all loved. If they had played in an American bar, they'd have been booed offstage for their choices (I think), but here was a different story. Some memorable songs included "Sweet Dreams," "Valerie," "Livin' on a Prayer," "Hit the Road, Jack," and "Don't Speak." I was amused.
     Saturday night I went out to see a play at the local English theater with my host mom and two friends of hers. We had dinner beforehand at an Afghan restaurant (which was incredible; if you've never had Afghan food, run, don't walk!) and then walked over to the theater, which is a small, intimate little place in the basement of a jazz club. The show was called "Boom!," an end-of-the-world piece about an Armageddon-like comet hitting the earth and destroying all human life with the exception of a nerdy marine biologist and a girl he met on a blind date (it was about as weird as it sounds, yes). It was quite a fun night. One of the women is a mom from Cliona's English kindergarten; she's Australian, married to a Spaniard, and moved here from India. And I think living a year in Germany is getting out of my comfort zone! It was fascinating to hear her stories, for sure. She's also the mother of triplets, which in a country wherein she barely speaks the language must be rough.
    Sunday was not very warm, but I headed into the city regardless and had a nice afternoon at an outdoor cafe (in the shade, sadly) with my crossword, cappuccino, and ice cream. I felt so German!


I also encountered my new favorite street artists: check them out here! www.konnexionbalkon.com/. They were incredible. And hilarious. I lovelovelovelovelove street musicians. And here, they're actually good!

The bassist danced most of the time and the violinist went up to people and scratched his violin in their faces. And made amazing facial expressions the whole time he played. I might be in love.




Being an au pair is pretty weird.  It's been, at this juncture, 7 months and 5 days since I moved to Germany. Sometimes that feels incredibly long, and sometimes ridiculously short. To be honest, I'm still not totally comfortable living here. There's just something odd about perpetually being a guest in a home. Not that they treat me like a guest, but it can be a weird feeling. I'm living with my employers. Part of the terms of my employment involve encountering their undergarments on a fairly regular basis (only when clean, fortunately. I'm spared doing anything involving dirty laundry). If I don't come out of my room and up to get breakfast until 11 on a Saturday morning, I feel sort of funny about it (and may occasionally try to hide).

     It's an interesting change to live with a family that isn't mine, because it definitely hampers one's social life. Whereas when living on one's own, it's the easiest thing to say, "I don't feel like going out tonight. It's expensive and tiring and plus, it's raining. I'll just invite friends over for pizza and we can watch a movie." But that doesn't exactly fly when dwelling in a home that's not your own. Choices are go out or stay in. I occasionally get stuck in that freshman-year-of-college mindset where I feel like a total loser if I stay in on a Friday night (though let's be real, the duties of an au pair leave me freedom to go out and make whatever poor choices I want on any night of the week), and for the first few months I was afraid my family would judge me if I stayed in too much and think I was depressed or a hermit or something like that. I do make an effort to go out two or three times a week at least, but when your monthly income leaves you about 50 euros a week to spend (and in an expensive city like Munich, one night of dinner and beer can suck most of that down), it is prudent to choose those nights wisely.
      Another duty of an au pair is lots of babysitting. And though I know I should be a typical party girl and moan and complain about having to stay in, babysitting is wonderful. It's the perfect excuse to stay in, cook a nice meal (which I rarely do when the family's home), drink a glass of wine, watch a TV show...I think I'm getting old.


A few choice quotes from this week:

Cliona: "Boys! Boys are silly! Die Jungs sind nicht lieb. Sie sind BÖSE!"(Those boys are not good. They are BAD BOYS!)

"You a silly girl!"

"You make a pups! You do! I put my kopf on your belly and they give noises!"

German Babytalk Potty-Related Words (for your personal edification):

pups (pronounced poops)=toot
kaka=poop
pipi=pee. Also refers to both boy and girl private parts

Kilian was being a total brat the other day when he got home from his friends and got mad at me when I refused to make him what he requested for dinner. (I'm not a maid. What's for dinner is what's for dinner. I don't take requests.) So he stuck out his tongue and stormed upstairs and slammed his door. Cliona looks slyly at me and says, "Kilian is rude. He is (whispered) blöd!!!" (means stupid, but is a verboten word for children to say!)

     Cliona's also had a rough week coming home; I think she's maybe just not adjusted to the time change yet or something. A couple days this week she cried most of the way home, interspersed by "I not crying!!" "Yes you are!" "I not!"(all the while sobbing, of course). One day her point of anger was that she wanted to go into people's yards and pick the flowers and Meanie Laura wouldn't let her. Oy.
 
     Sadly the weather's been rather cold and rainy this week (with threatened SNOW on Easter! What happened to my springtime?), but we got in some good park time last week and a couple days this week.  I wish the kids were a tad older when it comes to park-playing, because then I could sit and read the whole time (wishful thinking), but Cliona still needs pushing on the swings every now and then and stuff like that. She's also too young to have mastered the knack of finding kids to play with, so she sort of just stands there mournfully watching the other little girls play. She does love running down the hill, preferably with me (though if I refuse, she insists I watch and laugh. Literally. "Und lachen! Ok? Ok?") and spinning in a circle (which terrifies me, as her idea of spinning is my spinning her by the arms, and I have visions every time of dislocated shoulders, though so far so good). There's also a slide at her favorite park which I consider to be a death trap for three-year-olds. It's just two metal poles in the shape of a slide, and the idea is you hook a leg and an arm over each pole and slide down like that. Watching Cliona lurch down by herself is almost heart-stoppingly terrifying, and I wait every second for her to lose control and fall on her head and break her neck, so I've forbidden her to go down without me standing under her. I don't know what the people who designed the playground were thinking. Not to be an overly litigious American, but man, put something like that on a jungle gym in the states and there would be lawsuits flying!

     Speaking German handicaps my personality. In English, I consider myself a fairly well-spoken, eloquent person, and my natural personality shines through fairly easily. Yes, you can interpret that as you wish, based on your knowledge of my personality. I'm snarky and sarcastic and somewhat of a class clown. But oh, not in German. In German, I'm well-mannered, reticent, quiet, hesitant to express my opinion. And sometimes I resent it. When the mean older woman who sits next to me in choir tells me (wrongly) that I messed up a note, I would very much like to have a swift witty retort involving the five places she screwed up most recently (true story. Do not even get me started on that woman). But I don't. My German is good, but not good enough for snarky, quick, under-the-breath-during-a-rehearsal comments. I can't make jokes, I can't give clever answers. Or I could, if everyone would patiently wait fifteen seconds between every line of a conversation. But that's not how things work.

       I am so incredibly lucky to somehow have chanced upon a family to own even more books than my own family. Like, seriously. This house is a freaking library. Terrified at the thought of heading overseas for a year without my beloved books, I packed as many as the leftover weight in my suitcase would allow, but lo and behold, I got to take most of them back home with me in November because my family has them! I've really excelled during this rather boring week and have read about...8 books in the last three days. Doing pretty well, I'd say. I'm currently having a lot of fun reading lots and lots of Ian McEwan, as well as any Holocaust/Cold War novels I can get my hands on. There are also shelves and shelves (and more shelves) of travel books, including two in my room. When I'm really feeling apathetic, I can perch on the edge of my bed and decide what looks like fun. Nepal? Croatia? Myanmar? New Zealand? Californi--wait, been there.  I'm also still slogging through Harry Potter und der Kammer des Schreckens (Chamber of Secrets), in an effort to hone my German reading skills. You will be disappointed to hear than He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's middle name is different in the German version. As are characters like Hermine, Magda (Marge), and Myrte (Myrtle). Oh, Harry Potter. I love you in any language. Sighhhh...

    My neighborhood is quite nice, though certainly nothing out of the ordinary. What is lovely, however, are the street names! I love in a clump of philosopher streets: Agrippa, Erasmus, Hegel, Schopenhauer. Nearby come the fairy tale streets: Elfen, Froschkönig, Schneewittchen, Dornröschen, Frau-Holle, Erlkönig, Rotkäppchen (those being Elf St., Frog Prince St., Snow White St., Sleeping Beauty St., Frau Holle St. (not a super common one, but Brothers Grimm), Erl King St., and Red Riding Hood Place). Over towards the next little suburb are the Wagnerian streets: Brünnhilden, Walküren, Wotan, Siegfried, Rheingold, Nibelungen. It makes my walks quite picturesque! And yes, I have carefully crafted my trek to my language course to go down Erlkönigstr. Obviously.

     Speaking of picturesque things, let me tell you about my new favorite Bavarian thing. Easter trees! A tradition I will certainly be adding to my ever-growing list of things to bring back to the states. Holiday decorations here are not inside the houses, nor are they endless strings of lights. They're trees! People decorate their trees! At Christmas people hung ornaments on the trees in their front yards, and now that Easter is swiftly approaching it's even cuter!
     Also, I've never lived somewhere where spring actually matters before. It's sort of exciting. In California, we vaguely notice it's somewhere around March 21, mutter, "Oh hey, it's probably spring now or something," and continue our sunbathing. But here, when the trees finally start shaking off the dead leaves (I thought those were supposed to come off in fall? Apparently not) and begin to show some green, it's cause for celebration. Lying in the sun last week in 65 degree weather practically gave me heatstroke. It was amazing. People are perpetually eating ice cream to celebrate the weather change, and the parks and public areas are packed. I think the day the weather got nice, everyone ran to the market and bought spring flowers, because pretty much every yard is boasting brightly colored tulips and daffodils to celebrate the change of the season.

Okay, this one's from a website, but it IS in Germany. Someday this will be my tree. OH my goodness.


Pretty trees outside the kindergarten!




Some brief comments on general German weirdness:
     Eggs are sold in tens. As are basically everything. The metric system invades the supermarket too.  You can buy black beans at two places in the whole of Munich. American-style food is everywhere, but never the stuff you'd expect. Most common: American marshmallows, American crunchy peanut butter, American sandwich bread.  Also, the supermarket sells pre-hardboiled, pre-painted eggs. Year-round. Where's the fun in that?
     Dogs are not (or rarely) neutered. I'm still taken aback when I see a cute dog hopping about in the U-Bahn, with his...well, you can imagine the picture, I'm sure.
     Getting bags at the market is so not done. You bring your own basket. Obviously.
     It doesn't matter if the sun's out and it's 65 degrees, if it's still early April, you wear a heavy jacket and closed-toed shoes. I get a lot of funny looks.
     Germans almost never pay with a credit card. Whereas in the US, I probably use a debit/credit card for the vast majority of my purchases, here I never have. People carry cash. That's just what they do. It helps that tax is included in prices of food, so if you go to a restaurant and get a 6 euro entree and a 2 euro cappuccino, your bill will be 8 euros. Every time. It makes it really easy. Also, the idea of a tip here is quite simple: forget that 15% crap, just round to the nearest whole number. Your total is 9,42? Give them 10. Done and done.
     Maybe this is just because I live in a relatively secluded area, but I don't really get the whole blackout shades thing. Our house has, on nearly every window that isn't surrounded by a hedge, a blackout shade that blocks out all outside light. Helps the kids get to sleep, of course, but the idea of blocking out all the outside if weird to me. I mean, on your bedroom window, sure, but who was planning on dancing naked on their balcony anyway?
     At least in my family, kids don't drink milk. Or water. They drink juice. With every meal. I can hear my dentist cringing from here. It still seems weird to me. Granted, they generally drink half-juice, half-water, but still! So much unnecessary sugar!

Moving on:
    I try, for the sake of the purity of this blog as a foreign-adventures blog and not a personal-ranting one, to keep my personal political opinions out of my entries, so I share this purely as a fascinating piece of foreign view of America.
    So you know that whole America's-been-having-a-little-trouble-lately thing? I don't know if Americans think it's that big of a deal. But here overseas, it's not thought of as a big deal, it's an established fact. My evidence: here are some of the top-selling political books right now in German bookstores.

  • Amerikas Letzte Chance: Warum sich die Weltmacht neu erfinden muss
         
    America's Last Chance: Why the World Power needs to reinvent themselves
  • Der Amerikanische Patient: Was der drohende Kollaps der USA für die Welt bedeutet
         
    The American Patient: What the imminent collapse of the USA means for the world
  • Was ist mit den Amis los?: Warum sie an Barack Obama hassen, was wir lieben
           
    What is wrong with the Americans?: Why they hate about Barack Obama what we love
  • Tea Party: Die weiße Wut: Was Amerikas Neue Rechte so gefährlich macht
           
    Tea Party: The White Wrath: What American's New Right is so dangerous
It was really sort of a shock to me that Europe (or at least Germany) takes it so for granted that the US is going down the toilet. Are people in the states aware that this is the way the rest of the world is looking at them? 

    Anyway, that's probably about it for this blog entry. My ride to Vienna leaves Munich in...9 hours, which means in that time I need to pack, shower, eat, get to where my ride leaves from (an hour away), and, you know...sleep. Happy weekend to everyone, and frohe Ostern!

Pretty girl painting

Sunday, February 19, 2012

I Finally Bought Batteries and Thus Have Some Photos! And Some Stories.

    Why hello, dear friends! Happy Sunday to you! It is rather a rather dreary and uninspiring day here; yesterday was gorgeous and practically spring-y, but today we've returned to the wet and cold that is winter in Germany. Fortunately the cold snap seems to have ended, and though not by any stretch of the imagination warm, the forecast for the next ten days is at least entirely positive. It's snowy and wet outside, so I've holed myself up in the nearest Starbucks (don't scoff; it's warm and cheap and open on Sundays and has free wifi!) with my computer, Harry Potter und die Kammer des Schreckens, and a large mug of tea.

     Starbucks in Europe is practically a clone of that in America, with the exception of one cool thing: if you say you're eating/drinking there, they give you a real coffee mug! In assorted tall, grande, and venti sizes, of course. Okay, it's not really that exciting, but it definitely gives it a feeling of homeyness!

     Anyway, as bleh (yes, that is a real descriptive word. Shhhh!) as today is, yesterday outdid itself in gorgeousness. The sun was out, the sky was bluer than blue, and the temperature was a whopping 45 degrees Fahrenheit! (Yes, up 50 degrees from some parts of last week!) Sadly, as the weekends (and presence of two very energetic and ready-to-play children upstairs) turn me into somewhat of a recluse in the mornings, I didn't proceed out into the world until about 3, and since my room's in the basement, I didn't even realize how lovely it was outside! Fortunately the sun has obliged since December by staying up later, so I took a bus ride into the eastern train station, a tram in a few stops, then walked the rest of the way into town along the river, only stopping to take some pictures and buy a couple of krapfen (Fasching's nearly over, after all!).

Walk to the bus stop

Families enjoying the day with their sleds

Bayrischer Landtag

Isar River 

Isar and Maximilliansbrücke


Icy riverbank


St Lukas Kirche


Rathaus dressed up for Fasching

    The day concluded with a couple of hours in Hugendubel's (Barnes and Noble's German sister) and a lovely meal at my favorite Indian restaurant with a friend! Quite a lovely Saturday.

    Interesting side note: German newspaper holder machiney things (do they have a specific name? The kind that stands on a street and you put money in to open it up and get a paper) aren't locked. You can open them without paying. Everyone is aware of this. And you know what? Like 90% of people still pay. How crazy is that? This country is ridiculous. 

     Okay, bathroom run. Cross your fingers no one steals my computer. If the rest of this blog is written in a voice (or language) other than mine, you'll know the worst has happened! 

DUN DUN DUN...

    Phew. Success. Someone was running out the door with it when I returned, but I beat them up and we're set for the post-bathroom-break part of the blog.

    A note on bathrooms: Not all of them cost money here, which I have trickily figured out. You just have to know the right ones to go to. Bathrooms in restaurants and coffee shops (and Starbucks) frequently have a bathroom attendant whose job it is to change toilet paper, wipe off sinks, et cetera. Though not required, it's generally expected to tip these women (not sexist, it's always been a woman, in my experience). But how much? Do you actually have to? This occasionally necessitates a run back from the bathroom to grab my coin purse. And how much is enough? 20 cents seems cheap. 50 seems like too much. Oh, the dilemmas. 
    Also, a word to the wise: the American habit of never referring to a restroom as what it's actually for (unless, I suppose, you're in some really hick town where they call it the shitter or something equally charming) is a purely American habit. If you ask someone where the bathroom is, they won't know. Same with restroom, WC, ladies' room. It's called a toilet. You're welcome.


    So let's back up a couple days more. As you may recall, we are currently in Faschingszeit: the six-ish days leading up to Ash Wednesday and the start of Lent. The true big day of Fasching is Faschingsdienstag, Faschings Tuesday (so the German Pancake/Shrove/Fat Tuesday / Mardi Gras). But the celebrations begin the Thursday before Fasching with Weiberfasching (wives' Fasching), a day that in traditional Fasching hot spots (the cities in the Rhineland) gives women permission to cut off the tie of any men they might encounter. Celebrations continue all weekend, culminating in wild celebrations on Monday (Rosinmontag) and Tuesday, with the Dance of the Market Women in the open air market in the city center. 

     My kiddies have celebrated by dressing up in costumes every day for kindergarten. (I heard moms at the kindergarten complaining about the Fasching theme--they're frustrated with silly themes that require costumes that won't be worn again. Pretty sure none of my Halloween costumes ever made it out of the house on a day other than the one for which they were intended...oops!). Cliona's costumes, unsurprisingly, have consisted of a blue princess, a pink princess, and a red princess. Kilian has branched out a little more and was a wizard the first day, a knight the second, and I think tomorrow the plan is for...no idea, actually. I'll tell you when I remember. 

Face painting that was waaaay too hard to get off. 

Pretty pretty princess!

Princess girls

    The city is dressed up for Fasching too! (Even in addition to the Krapfen!)

Lamppole in city center

    Though as an American I really have no comprehension of how to celebrate Fasching like a German (well, I could probably figure it out, but shelling out 100 euros as an entrance fee to a masquerade ball seems a little excessive. Especially on my salary.), my friends and I gave it a try Friday night. A friend's birthday celebration gave us a minor excuse to put on costumes and paint the town (okay, not the second part. Only a little). I confess I was not in the costume spirit, and Scrooge-ily rejected all offers to find me one, until someone brilliant suggested I paint on a mustache. Why this appealed so much, I don't know, but I rose to the challenge. Or rather, someone armed with eyeliner and better makeup-applying skills than I did. I make a great canvas. 

Costume completed.
Twinsie Frenchmen
"That ain't no Diet Coke." --Leigh Stephenson

    Another German fact, especially relevant to above photo: In Germany, you can get beer everywhere. There is no such thing as a restaurant that doesn't have beer. Seriously. Case in point: see above. When our tram was shown not to arrive for another 17 minutes, we took off to the Burger King across the street and purchased a couple of Burger Beers. In Burger King cups. Love. Amazingly enough, the type of beer was Miller Lite. What?

    Anyway, the night progressed fairly standardly, with some more beers, cupcakes, and other random things (that was all, actually; I just need three to avoid reconfiguring my grammar), eventually progressing into a dance party, which eventually progressed into a snowball fight, an attempted trip to a club that was thwarted by a group of passing Germans who promised knowledge of a karaoke bar. I stayed along for the ride until seeing the outside of the bar (spending the walk in cheery German conversation with a fellow who had grown up in Seattle), then seeing the time, wended my way sadly back to the subway station with Leigh in tow.

Saddened at the state of my mustache and rose. I think I was channeling a mime at this point.

  An uneventful U-bahn ride later, I arrived at my home station, only to find not only no bus awaiting for me, but no mention anywhere of when it would arrive. The thrifty lass that I am, I stubbornly refused to pay eight euros for a taxi ride and instead walked the 2.5 miles home in the snow and ice (only falling once! My knee is bruised.). Okay, maybe a taxi would've been a good idea. But whatever. I made it! 

    Today has been quiet and peaceful (if totally lazy). Tomorrow I seem to have off, so fingers crossed a plan to dash down to Schliersee and play in the snow with Leigh for the day works out! 

    Last Tuesday I again got the chance to work at the English kindergarten. I feel bad for being so happy about it, as it only happens with one of the teacher's son gets sick, but oh well. It's surprisingly less stressful than I would have thought, and the kids are super sweet and fun and (much to my surprise) adore me. It's also put me at 200 euros OVER budget for this month--a welcome addition! Hopefully now I will be able to register for another language class.     

    My family has officially picked their new au pair, which is a little weird to think about. Granted, I'm not leaving anytime soon, but it's still funny to think the time is coming--I sometimes still feel like I just got here! The end of February will mark my six-months-in-Munich-iversary. I feel like I've done pretty well in six months--I know my way around, know how to say pretty much anything I want to, am fully confident with public transportation, and can even find my way home in the wee hours of the morning after too many beers. This month has been a little lonesome, especially with Nate back in the States for grad school auditions and thus not having him around to talk to very much (six hours is an awful time difference), but I'm getting through it and having some fun regardless. In a week and a half I take off to Sofia for about five days to greet him on his return to Europe, so there's that to look forward to. And in the meantime, I'm doing my best to find adventures and have fun!